To create an extremely bad website is a difficult task. It might seem easy at first sight, but it is not at all. And one has to try very hard to achieve this noble goal.
One of the most difficult parts to ruin, when designing a website, is the NAVIGATION.
The difficulty of a chaotic navigation lies in the ability of the webdesigner to go against that which we call "Common Sense". So one has to employ all ones strength and intelligence to become... dumb! Logic has got to be abandoned and complete surealism has to take over...
The famous webdesign rules
1) KISS (Keep it simple stupid)
2) The 2 clicks rule (the user must be able to access all pages from the main navigation in 2 clicks)
have got to be reverted and avoided.
If you want to completely confuse and agitate your visitors they must not find what they are looking for at no cost! Your success is proved when they wonder countless hours clicking through the hundreds of useless links you provide to many pages that promise the same information!
Another very important thing is that your contact information is not valid. By no means place a valid telephone number or email and use different pages with different contact info! Let the user have a little adventure! Allow the visitor to go through a life-quest, allow him to develope his psychic abilities to guess your contact info!
Still, you will not have created an extremely bad website if you keep your content up to date. Thats something that has to be avoided. Keep your content preferably one year old or even more. Nobody will be interested in last years meeting, when they are looking for the time and place of this years meeting.
Be extra careful when publishing essential information. You do not want the visitor to access it directly and quickly! You want to torture your visitor and you want this torture to be slow and painful... Use at least 10 links that will lead to a page with the desired information. Then don't be silly and spoil it! Attach a word document with the information and let the user download it. Let them wait, search for a place to download the precious .doc , let them scan it with the antivirus and finally allow Word to open. A triumph! You want your visitors to do something, dont just feed them with the information quickly and easily!
Even better! Publish different documents for the same subject and update only one of them! Let the visitor download all of them, compare them, study them and arrive at a logical conclusion.
The visitor might as well open the window and scream due to frustration. And when the visitor is heard miles away or seen pulling out his hair then you know you have succeded your goal.
Promise the information, create a labyrinth, keep it as complex and complicated as possible, never update your content unless you have material more than one year old and lead your visitors to insanity.
Well done, you have created an extremely bad website.
Post dedicated to the website of my university.
9 comments:
εκλπληκτικό! φοβερό! προφανώς αυτά δεν είναι μόνο θεωρητικά, για την πρακτική εφαρμογή θα μπορούσες να δώσεις και ένα ή περισσότερα παραδείγματα. επίσης ξέχασες να αναφέρεις την εκτεταμένη χρήση κεφαλαίων και την χρήση χρωμάτων που εκτώς από κακόγουστα εμποδίζουν τον χρήστη να διαβάσει άνετα το περιεχόμενο αφήνοντάς τον μόνο να βρεί το κολπάκι τής επιλογής με το ποντίκι.
βασικά αναφαίρεσαι στην σελίδα τού πανεπιστημίου σου. (τώρα είδα και το τέλος) αλλά δεν δίνεις την διεύθυνσή του.
:) Σωστά, και αυτό που λες ταιριάζει, απλά δεν το είδα (ευτύχώς) ακόμα στη σελίδα του Παν/στημίου μου. Απόλαυσε EAP.gr. Αν και οι σελίδες για τους φοιτητές θέλουν κωδικό.
These comments are all Greek to me. It's an excellent post, and my heart goes out to you and your excursions through your uni's website. One thing that one sees in Germany is websites that start out in German and then end up in English (some international companies do this). That must be very confusing to non-English speakers.
Lol hmm I think I win in the cheesyiest and worst blog ever. But I try!:)
@wally: as I pointed out in my post, it takes skill and art to make something really bad! So even if you had the worst blog ever, that would be something exceptional!
I want to thank a reader for mentioning viruswitch in his interesting post about keeping things real. Unfortunately I found no other contact option, since no email is published on the site nor can one register for comments.
Hahaha, nice post. Our Government (Indian) websites are exactly what you just described.
Using AVG protection for a couple of years, I'd recommend this solution to all you.
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